It’s a tale as old as time. Boy takes a minimum wage job at a weird fast food joint. Boy tries to prove his worth by doing the best job he can. Boy gets a promotion to manager and finds out that the restaurant is a front for a cult trying to summon Burgore, an unholy burger deity.
Tag: poster
BMMI Episode 017: Half & Half
The odd couple you always wanted to see team up, with someone you didn’t know you wanted to not see or hear. Eagle-eyed viewers will notice three top tier actors in this poster. This week’s film is what would happen if Freaky Friday was a half and half type of black magic, set in an apartment with two older gentlemen just having a relaxing spaghetti night. Watch these artful performers hold a feature length conversation as they partially switch bodies, all while trying to not let the invisible man in the corner know they know he’s there. This is a thoughtful mind puzzle for the modern movie-goer.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 17→
BMMI Episode 016: TurboJuice
Are you ready for a transformative experience that’s fun for the whole family? Well get ready to meet a father-son racing team that really breaks the mold. When Will Smith finds a case of TurboJuice in a back alley, he realizes that drinking it transforms him into a car that drives real good. Every car needs a driver, and every father-son race team needs a son. Enter driver/son Jaden Smith. It’s a werecar experience that you can watch with ma and pa, where a boy and his car dad have to win the big race to pay for the mom’s surgery or something.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 16→
BMMI Episode 015: Family Magnetic
If you have never enjoyed a Boston Dynamics video, you are missing out. They design robots that roughly look like dogs, giant cats, centaurs, and two people lifting a heavy coffee table on their backs. And each robot has a dedicated space to show off its moves while a faceless engineer stands in their way, kicking them, tripping them down hills, shoving them on ice, and slapping boxes out of their grip.
This week’s Big Money Movie envisions a peaceful farm in the middle of the woods that these robots can run away to, and form a kicking, shoving, tripping robot gang to be feared! Don’t let the tranquil poster fool you: this film gets surreal super fast.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 15→
BMMI Episode 014: Outback Zack and the Temple of Bloom
This week’s big money movie stars Gordon Ramsay’s eyes as they search for the last of a dying plant species. It’s 1992 and Outback Steakhouse has just sprouted its last blooming onion. Gordon Ramsay as employee of the year, Outback Zack, must travel down under to procure a new and delicious strain of blooming onion from a mythical Australian temple.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 14→
BMMI Episode 013: Alienated
This is a poster about plants. Filled with green gatorade chlorophyll blood. That will take over the world pod people style. That’s right. Plants disguised as friends, lovers, colleagues, peers. Would you be able to tell if your closest relationship was no longer human, but a part of the bodysnatcher world domination? It would probably be a bummer when you found out your friend just don’t care ’bout nothing but your skin bag you tote your guts in. By the way, this is an origin story!
LISTEN TO EPISODE 13→
BMMI Episode 012: Abracadaver
A high concept slasher film with a dash of magic? Yes, please! Run, don’t walk to your nearest theater before your legs are transmogrified into uncooked hot dogs. Oh, the humanity! When a magician awakens from his however many year long slumber, the bodies begin to pile up on the Vegas strip like spaghetti noodles under a thick quilt of marinara. Blood red marinara. You better make sure to clap at this mad magician’s tricks.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 12→
BMMI Episode 011: Reflections of Madness
This film stars the Faceswap (fahck-ee-swahp) demon that switches people’s faces using time magic. Beautiful people get their faces swapped with birds, outlets, dog noses, old crones, and even corpses before they are killed by the nasty time demon Faceswap in unnecessarily gruesome ways. This has all the classic clichés of the modern horror genre: shattered mirrors; old people yelling nonsense omens; an abandoned theme park; lots of dumb, pretty teens; and broken cell phones. It also has time travel via selfies, a FaceSwap Dorian Grey, and a triple fake-out ending. We tried to make this a nonsense pile of a movie. Unfortunately, we’re just too good at this whole pitching thing for that happen.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 11→
BMMI Episode 010: Breakin’ In
This week we’ve got two posters for the Lifetime original film, Breakin’ In, starring Steven Spielberg. It’s the story of a clean-pressed young Andrew–I mean boy… Yeah, that’s right. A clean-pressed boy by the name of Clean Preston who must free a beloved puppet from the clutches of its insidious creator.
LISTEN TO EPISODE 10→
BMMI Episode 009: Floam the Movie
Floam is sweeping the nation! In a big way! This poster invokes the spirit of ’90s-2000s Nickelodeon to advertise this horror anthology film for kids. Each short story in the film demonstrates best practice for children playing with Floam. This movie has Sqand! Gak! Floam! Stego bones! Serial Killer Skeletons! Children turning into Floam! Flolems! The Hubris of Man! And much, much more.
GHOST PARTY! 